I haven’t written in a while because I haven’t been sure what to say. A little more than a week ago I started a post about moving forward with our IVF plans and impersonating Roo in order to try to get a price quote on medication from various online pharmacies. And then that evening I was doing errands when Roo called, saying she wasn’t sure she was going to be able to do IVF. We’ve talked more in the last week, and have decided on a new plan. It’s been an incredibly difficult decision because Roo reallyreallyreally wants to be pregnant. But there are a lot of reasons why the IVF process (which is not exactly a picnic for anyone) would be extra-hard for her. She has been so brave throughout our TTC adventures and I absolutely support her making the decision that’s right for her.
So the new plan is that we’ll do one or two more IUIs with her, and then switch to trying with me. We’ve only done two monitored/clomid IUIs, so it seems reasonable to try a few more. If that doesn’t work, I’ll do a few IUIs–maybe 3 or 4–I’m not sure how many I could take. And then we’ll move on to IVF with me. My parents have agreed to help us out financially so that we can move through these steps as quickly as possible.
I’m very sad that we’re looking at the possibility of Roo not getting pregnant. And I’m sad that the process will likely drag on longer. I’m nervous about being the Emergency Back-Up Uterus. But it’s good to finally have a plan, and it feels like the right plan for us.
I spent much of the last week back in limbo as we continued to work out our new plan, but it was a surprisingly nice week. My birthday was last weekend, and it included breakfast in bed (brought to me by Roo and a plastic-trumpet-playing Tadpole), and some lovely time in the house by myself while Roo and Tad did the grocery shopping. We bought our Solstice/Christmas tree last weekend and had a cozy time putting it up this afternoon.
In the midst of this crazy emotion-filled time I feel very close to my little family and am looking forward to a lot of time together in a few weeks. We’re all off from school/work from December 20th through January 1st. I may be stir-crazy and bored a few days in, but right now the break sounds great. And sometime soon we’ll do something that will hopefully bring us closer to a baby. I think the prospect of doing something new (even if it’s just IUIs with me, which doesn’t necessarily bring us any better odds statistically speaking) feels good.